For children with SEND, anxiety or sensory overload are common factors affecting behaviour and attendance, which are not always easy to pin-point. If you think there may be underlying needs, discuss and explore with school how these might be assessed and supported.
It can be useful to think about who you would like to meet with in school. School staff have different roles and you might want to change who you meet with as your child’s needs emerge or change.
For example, to start with you may have spoken with their class teacher, or someone in a pastoral role at the school and you may now find you want to talk to the SENCO to discuss next steps with assessing and supporting your child’s needs.
You may find it helpful to look at your school’s ‘SEN Information Report’, which should explain how the school identifies and supports pupils with SEN:
What is a SEN Information Report?
Working with school
Ask your child what they are finding difficult and what they would like to change – this can help identify anything particularly worrying them.
Your child’s views should always be the starting point of any discussion about support.
Here are some ideas for support strategies for your child which you could ask about:
- meet and greet by a trusted member of staff at the start (sometimes during or at the end) of the day
- school staff regularly checking with them that they are okay
- visual timetable – clear information about what happens now and next
- help to understand and manage their feelings and emotions
- positive praise (for getting through a lesson – replacing sanctions for challenging behaviour)
- ‘time-out’ card for when feeling overwhelmed in lessons
- lesson breaks (to allow some calm down time)
- changes to timetable if particular lessons are a trigger
- learning away from the classroom, in a dedicated area or room sometimes known as a ‘safe space’
- lunching away from the dinner hall, ask whether any lunchtime clubs available. (avoiding a crowded dinner hall)
- 1:1 or small group interventions, support programmes, or friendship groups
- permission to leave lessons or school 5 minutes early to avoid crowded corridors
Involving specialist services
You can contact the school nursing service, your child’s GP or contact the Children and Young People Emotional Wellbeing Hub (if you live in Lowestoft or Waveney go to the ‘Emotional and mental health‘ pages) for advice, recommendations or a possible referral to specialist health services.
Share this information with school so they have the full picture, and you can discuss next steps together.
When you meet with school to discuss your child’s support plan, you can ask about referral options, for example:
- counselling (some schools have a regular counsellor available)
- an Early Help Assessment (EHA) – a way of working with families and assessing needs
- referral to the Specialist Education Services
- the Psychology and Therapeutic Service (for an Educational Psychologist or Inclusion Facilitator)
- to a specialist health service
- for wellbeing and specialist mental health services (for example, Learning Disability CAMHS).
- a request to the local authority to carry out an EHC needs assessment, or where an EHC plan is already in place, requesting an early review
For the full range of support services available to children and young people with SEND go to: www.suffolklocaloffer.org.uk
For wellbeing and mental health services:
- Just One Norfolk – Lowestoft and Waveney
- Emotional Wellbeing Hub – East and West Suffolk
What if my child says they feel unable to attend school?
Sometimes anxiety can worsen to the point that a child or young person starts to feel they are unable to go to school. You might hear this referred to as ‘Emotionally based school avoidance (EBSA)’.
Speak to their school as soon as possible to let them know about the difficulties they are experiencing and what support they might need so that they feel able to go to school.
You can make an appointment for them to see their GP, who may talk to you about referrals for specialist support.
Take a look at our information: Support for children who cannot attend school
You may find this article interesting ‘Can’t, not won’t: Rethinking school avoidance’ written by an Educational Psychologist, which says:
If there’s one thing I’ve learned from working with children experiencing EBSA, and also with the adults and schools supporting them, it’s this: they’re not ‘refusing’ education, they’re overwhelmed by it. By understanding the emotional roots of school avoidance and creating environments that feel safe and supportive, we can begin to bridge the gap between home and school, and fully support the children and young people growing up today.
Further information
- Medical needs
- SEN Support
- Working with school
- Attendance
- Support for children who cannot attend school
Useful links
- Wellbeing in education – Suffolk County Council
- PACT (support to parents and carers of children and young people with mental health issues)
- Children’s commissioner guide for parents on school attendance
- Young Minds guide to School Refusal and Anxiety
- Anxiety UK
- A collection of Norfolk and Suffolk NHS Foundation Trust Youtube videos
- Norfolk and Suffolk NHS Foundation Trust parent workshops
- Five Finger Breathing (a simple guided breathing exercise) – short video from Pooky Knightsmith mental health
Did you know?
We offer advice and support to young people directly and can help them to share their views and get involved in discussions about their support:
- Service leaflet for young people (PDF)
- Service postcard for children and young people (PDF)
- ‘Support to get your voice heard‘ (easy-read information leaflet – explaining the advocacy SENDIASS can provide).
- Wellbeing support and advice for young people